SHAMING SLUT SHAMING
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Slut. Whore. Trollop. Skank. Nympho. THAT kind of girl. Have you ever noticed how many words there are for judging women who enjoy sex?
Now let’s consider some of the words for men who enjoy sex. Gigolo. Stud. Casanova. Player. Ladies’ man.
Wait a second! All of those are compliments!
That’s weird.
No, it’s actually quite deliberate. In fact, if you want to insult a man who likes sex, you have to call him a man whore or a man slut. That’s right, you have to call him a name that is reserved for demeaning women.
On this episode, I read an excerpt from my new book, 3 Secrets To The Happy and Healthy Relationship You’ve Always F*cking Wanted. The chapter, entitled, Choose Your Words Wisely, addresses how the language often used for women who openly enjoy sex or celebrate their sexuality, is nothing more than an attack on our autonomy. It’s also rooted in patriarchal expectations of women and a way to keep us at odds with each other. This is completely calculated because infighting among the oppressed is what keeps us oppressed. So, in this episode I unpack the reasons why you might be thinking that sex and pleasure are not for you. Spoiler Alert: We’ve been brainwashed throughout history to think this way.
The truth is, you have every right to sexual pleasure and one way to allow more of said pleasure into your life is to deprogram yourself. That’s a big part of my book and also my work with other women who want to stop leaving so much pleasure on the table.
Speaking of my work, thanks to our friendly global pandemic it’s been almost two years since I’ve been able to speak before a live audience. I’ve missed you motherfuckers! Last week, one of my listeners collaborated with the fine folks at Dama Wines in Walla Walla, Washington and I hopped on a plane (actually 2 planes) to Walla Walla for a really fun meet and greet with my readers.
Trust me, I wrote the book on this.
It’s totally fine if you’d prefer to ask your question anonymously.
Signing copies for my new friends.
My socks were totally on point. #Priorities
Before the book signing we had a really fun Q&A about sex and pleasure. Did I mention there was a lot of amazing wine on hand? Yeah, that didn’t hurt.
Anyway, this event made me realize just how much I miss meeting my readers and listeners face to face, so I came up with the single greatest or possibly most disastrous idea ever — which is why I’m all about it.
If you have a book club and you and your friendies choose my book, I’ll Zoom in, say hello and we can have a fun Q&A. (Wine or no wine is up to you). We’ll keep it fun and light but it’s a great way for me to say hello and get to know to the folks who are reading and enjoying my book. Is that you? It is!?! Well then let’s talk, sister!
Email me and I’ll Zoom into your book club for some fun.
Some restrictions apply…I just haven’t figured them out yet.
Also, stick around for a truly hilarious Screw Confession.
The excerpt I read in this episode is also available on Medium.com. Check it out along with many other stories I’ve published over the years.
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If there’s anything or anyone you’d like to hear on this show, or if you have any questions, feel free to email me at info@sexedthemusical.com
Thanks, as always, for listening.
See you next time!
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